Kissing You Goodbye

"Don't you fucking giggle at me" he muttered against his lips, licking his way into his mouth.

Gerard rolled until he was straddling Mikey, moaning and he kissed him.

Mikey bucked his hips into Gerard's but then started struggling and panicking. Memories from the first time Gerard had pinned him down like this and he wasn't so exicted by the idea of it were flooding back and it was scaring him. "N-No" he whimpered.

As soon as Gerard heard he moved off quickly.

He continued to breath heavily in fear "G-Gee" he whimpered.

Gerard hugged him "Shh, shh Mikey it's ok"

"No" Mikey said, pushing him away "Dont touch me, p-please" he then ran away to his room to hurt himself.

Gerard knew instinctively what was happening and ran upstairs after him. he got the door oppen and took the razor away from Mikey "No! I won't let you do this!"

Mikey jumped for the blade "Give it back" he said, tears bubbling in his eyes "I need it".

"No you don't" said gerard, holfing it out of hsu reach "I'd rather you hurt me than you"

Mikey punched him in the stomach in an attempt to make him drop it "GIVE IT TO ME!" he screamed.

Gerard grunted in pain but clasped the razor.

"G-GIVE IT!!" he cried, tears streaming down his face "Oh God..." he said quietly, burying his face into his hands.

Blood trickled oput of Gerards hand "No"

"I-I'm so fuc-fucking messed up..." Mikey whispered.

Gerard held him close "No, you're not. I hurt you but it doesn't make YOU messed hup."

"I d-don't fucking eat, I-I don't have friends, I don't go-go out and I just fucking begged you-u for a razor b-blade!!" Mikey shouted into his chest "DON'T FUCKING TELL ME I'M NOT MESSED!".

Gerard whinced "Even if you are, i made you this way" he muttered, kising the top of Mikeys head "I love you Miocheal, i don't care if you're fucked up, all the best people are,."

Mikey pushed him away and pointed to his door "Get out" he whispered.

Gerard looked m inorly hurt, having stupidly expected some form of reciprocation.

"I can't, not right now, you've only been here two days" Mikey said, turning away from Gerard, unable to stand his hurt look.

Gerard looked at his feet "F-Fine, just don't hurt yourself

"I can love you Gerard, just not right now"

"it's ok" smiled gerard, kissing his head "i can wait" he added before leaving.

Mikey reached under his bed after Gerard had left and got hi box of tools. He pulled out a knife and attacked his thighs.